Look, I know I “shouldn’t” be watching American Idol because I’m a guy, but (1), the show is entertaining, and (2), they have hot chicks on the show every now and then, and (3) good singing is good singing.
Unfortunately, Adam Lambert is not a good singer.
This fuckin’ douchebag is 27 years old. TWENTY-SEVEN YEARS OLD! He’s a year younger than me, yet insists on rocking the “hip-for-2006” black emo hairdo. His whole entire appearance SCREAMS “Gimmick”. This idiot wasn’t dressing like this when he was a teenager. I can totally picture this shithead in some JNCO’s with an Akira t-shirt on working on his ‘Zine and dissing anyone who listened to Puffy.
Secondly, not only is this affected testicle wart a poseur, but he CAN’T SING! All he does is hit these screechy-ass high notes that make me wanna throttle him.
I’ve gone on the record as saying that if I had a “Jump into the TV” machine, I’d pop in a Star Wars movie and join the rebellion, or I’d pop in a Girls Gone Wild dvd and have the time of my life.
Now, I’d have a new goal.
I’d hop into the tv when that fuckin’ tool is singing, and I’d slap him right in the face and tell him he’s faker than WWE Diva boobs, and then I’d flip off his equally-douchey lookin’ friends.
Choke on your eventual loss to Danny Goky, shitface.