Adam Lambert Should Be Beaten With A Wiffleball Bat

Look, I know I “shouldn’t” be watching American Idol because I’m a guy, but (1), the show is entertaining, and (2), they have hot chicks on the show every now and then, and (3) good singing is good singing.

Unfortunately, Adam Lambert is not a good singer.

This fuckin’ douchebag is 27 years old. TWENTY-SEVEN YEARS OLD! He’s a year younger than me, yet insists on rocking the “hip-for-2006” black emo hairdo. His whole entire appearance SCREAMS “Gimmick”. This idiot wasn’t dressing like this when he was a teenager. I can totally picture this shithead in some JNCO’s with an Akira t-shirt on working on his ‘Zine and dissing anyone who listened to Puffy.

Secondly, not only is this affected testicle wart a poseur, but he CAN’T SING! All he does is hit these screechy-ass high notes that make me wanna throttle him.

I’ve gone on the record as saying that if I had a “Jump into the TV” machine, I’d pop in a Star Wars movie and join the rebellion, or I’d pop in a Girls Gone Wild dvd and have the time of my life.

Now, I’d have a new goal.

I’d hop into the tv when that fuckin’ tool is singing, and I’d slap him right in the face and tell him he’s faker than WWE Diva boobs, and then I’d flip off his equally-douchey lookin’ friends.

Choke on your eventual loss to Danny Goky, shitface.

–RTH

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6 Responses to “Adam Lambert Should Be Beaten With A Wiffleball Bat”

  1. websince1982 Says:

    *stands and applauds, tips hat and bows*

    for the first time i have been left in a hilarity/rage induced silence.. well done, reyski

  2. bustacracka Says:

    Hey Rey-Rey, sorry to hear about the job brutha..

    Hows life, any further forward on the album?

    I’ve decided to get into this blogging tip, if you could add me to your blogroll that would be sweet…

    Sex, drugs & sausagerolls

    Keep it Cheesy..

    Peace

    • reythehussein Says:

      Busta! How you been, amigo?

      Album’s underway, just working out the kinks in a new studio.

      Gimme a link to the blog and I’ll add it to the blogroll post haste!

      All…THE bes!

      –Rey

  3. DeeJay Leche Says:

    hahahahahahaha this is the shit… NICE! couldn’t of said it better myself…

  4. bustacracka Says:

    http://hiphop4yoursoul.wordpress.com

    I’m just getting started but i got a few post in the back of my mind ready to be written..

    Sweet dude, life is good, summer is coming & that means music festivals!!!

    Sex, drugs & sausagerolls

    Keep it Cheesy..

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